Time Flies :)

2Lbs  9 oz

3 lbs 8 oz

3 lbs 5 oz

My sister Jessica and her three kids came from Japan yesterday! Im really sad that her kids cant meet the babies yet, because kids cant come in the NICU, but Jessica was able to hold Cash and Sterling :)

 

*Grateful*

I'm sitting in the NICU, having 'a moment'. There is a baby down the hall from us who I dont think is doing well. There are doctors and nurses all around them, and the mom is a young girl who I know is having the worst day of her life. And I couldn't help but notice that there was no one with her that looked like the father. But her mother is with her. So its made me realize how incredibly blessed we have been. Our babies are doing so well. They are gaining weight like crazy. They all have bad days, and need help... but they are going to be fine. Things could have been so much worse. The other day, our nurse Jane, who we love (we offered her an in-home job if she'd come live with us. I think she thought we were joking)... anyway. Jane told me the other day "I'm so glad they are doing so well. There are so many things that easily could have gone wrong. They could have had so many more issues, and look at them!"
And she is so right. It's amazing. Our babies are here. And they are making progress. That's all we can ask for.
Seeing that young girl also made me realize how lucky I am to have Matt. Clearly I dont know her situation, and I never will, nevertheless, I'm grateful to have such an amazing husband, who is already an amazing father. I'm grateful that his job allows him to spend so much time here in the NICU with us.
I will never again feel sorry for myself for being in this situation. Right now I feel like the luckiest girl in the world.

One Month!

I can't believe the babies will be a month old in 3 days (on the 24th). Time flies.. and at the same time it doesn't. It has been a LONG, emotional month. Lots of ups and downs, luckily I feel like more 'ups' than 'downs'.
They all have their good days and bad. Each of them have been treated for different things... they've all had blood transfusions, Cash has been on steroids. I think hardest part so far is just waiting. Waiting for them to gain weight, to breathe on their own, to eat on their own, waiting for their PDA's to close on their own. And in the mean time all we can do is be with them, change diapers, help with baths, and hold them once a day. Its so hard watching them struggle. They are so teeny tiny. But we have so many good moments with them too. They've all started to grin at us, and they are so much more alert. We are getting to know their little personalities already, and they are all so different, and adorable :)

Cash, or our "wimpy white boy" as the doctors tend to call him (i'm not offended at all), has come a long way. His lungs were really wet and underdeveloped. He had a moderate-large Patent Ductus Ateriosus, and his heart was beginning to enlarge. It broke my heart to see him so uncomfortable and to see him struggle so much to breathe. But they gave him Lasix for clear his lungs, 10 days of steroids for his lungs, and as of about 4 days ago they dont hear his heart murmur anymore! He'll get an echo in a few days to see if his PDA really closed. But he is doing SO much better. He looks so chunky compared to the other two kids. He's a whopping 3 lbs 3 oz today! And I knew we would have at least one... He's our little red head :) 

Jones is such a little character :) He's the one who always has his eyes wide open and will grin at us. While he's doing all those cute things, he just forgets to breathe. He's given me a heart attack at least twice.  It's the worst, most helpless feeling ever. I told him next time he's for sure grounded. I can't handle it. He's slowly following in Cash's footsteps with his lung issues. But they are just monitoring him for now. He's 3 lbs now!

Sterling :) Our little princess. She also happens to be our rockstar. She has been doing great ever since she got here. Pretty much their only goals for her right now are to gain weight. Which she is, 2 lbs 3 oz. She's finally looking like a baby now. She was so tiny when she was born, she just looked like skin a bones, so its so nice to see her grow. One of the Respiratory Therapists here always puts little bows on her head, and brought her a headband. She's adorable. 

We are so in love with our babies. I could literally just sit and stare at them all day. I'm so glad I get to be their mom. We get to hold them all once a day. Once they get bigger we can hold them more often. I hate that we have to go home without them. It's still so weird to me. I miss them as soon as we leave the hospital. But hopefully this next month goes by fast. It helps to know that they are in good hands while we are away. The nurses here are great. We are really pleased with our whole experience here at Good Samaritan.

We are so grateful for all the prayers for them. I know they make a difference. People have been so supportive with prayers, fasting, and bringing us meals. We are so grateful.